Every single time I start to write a blog I get really nervous. I spend ages racking my brains trying to find something to write about that people will want to read – whilst making it personal – and present it in a way that won’t come back to bite me later! When I eventually start writing I panic over the words for hours, checking and re-checking each and every line to see whether I’ve left a glaring spelling mistake, or put twelve commas together, or invented a metaphor that has the potential to offend the entire human race!
Can you see why I find this nerve-wracking?! Having said this, my biggest fear (when it comes to writing) is of being vulnerable to people I don’t know. Every time I write I feel like I’ve stitched a bit of myself into every phrase, and then gone and sent it out into the big-wide-internet, kicking and screaming: ‘Here I am! Take your best shot!’
For me, there is no first line of defence against a cyber attack of words. Each and every one, whether pleasant or scathing, hits it’s mark, and I risk myself in doing this, as most people do when they post on-line. For me, this is especially true when it comes to talking about my favourite subject…
I want to talk about Jesus as much as I talk about the weather. That is: ALL THE TIME! But I feel that in our society Jesus is seen as a taboo subject, or a curse word. Never talk about politics or religion, right?
I live in a country where free speech is supposedly a human right. However, there is an unspoken rule that screams ‘Christians should be seen and not heard!’ and it feels stifling! Like an electric dog collar that shocks you into silence if you make a noise.
I have many friends who don’t know Jesus, and I love them all dearly! But I find it very difficult to shake the feeling that every conversation is a potential trap. Therefore I feel that every thought I have has to be meticulously censored, and every word monitored. Needless to say I talk about the weather a lot in these conditions! But it becomes exhausting when you feel like your mind is working a double shift trying to maintain connections whilst forcing your teeth to hold your tongue for the thousandth time!
Anyway, I only bring this up because today I let my words off the lead a bit with one of my good friends who doesn’t know Jesus. What I love about this friend is that we are complete opposites with totally different lives and stories, yet we can still connect (even if we mostly stick to singing and the weather). We have a fantastic friendship, and I love her to pieces, and since knowing her, her stereotypes of hard-nosed Christianity have begun to dissolve (even though the collar has very rarely slipped when I’m with her). However I’ve realised that, though words are important, it’s not just what we say, but also the way we live that reflects the message we bring.
My message to the world is that Jesus is alive! He lives in me! And He loves EVERYONE!
This reality automatically makes me different, and I can’t really help that. But people still see the difference even when I guard my words. My friends still see the difference! And even though I may make huge mistakes, I can’t stop the truth of this being displayed in my life.
Being a follower of Jesus doesn’t make me a better person. On the contrary! It just makes me a very messy person who’s loved by a VERY MASSIVE GOD!!!
And so, with that in mind, I send this out into the big-wide-internet towards your shining eyes, in the hope that this humble blog (with it’s probable spelling mistakes and questionable metaphors) will make you chuckle, make you think, and in some small way, get that message across…
Click here to see Melissa Live in concert on Saturday 13th June 2015